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Der Gothmann: The Humanoid Boogie

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Tag Archives: Health

How many of you guys and dolls have had IBS as a symptom or a diagnosis?

Would you believe I couldn't find a single de-motivational poster about IBS that wasn't stupid or didn't have a cat with vomit stuck to it's face?

It has been a couple of weeks since I was diagnosed with a functional bowel disorder, resulting from over-anxiety about work and money, etceteras, and it has been a chronic ball-shrinking nuisance ever since.  It is not, as many might claim, a modern problem.  Apparently, the cause and treatment of IBS was discovered thousands of years ago by ayurveda, the “oldest health system known to man”.  Apparently, it was called “grahani dosha“.  I suspect the man who wrote the linked article of not getting his facts straight, and generally, being a pillock.

He claims that IBS, or “grahani dosha” can be “cured” by carefully adjusting to a natural diet and a balance of correct herbs and spices.
I claim that the man still doesn’t have his facts straight.  What he writes ‘cure’,  he clearly means ‘manage’, and when he writes ‘natural’, he clearly means ‘non-trigger foods’.  The funny thing is, your average modern doctor will recommend you also ‘manage’ your symptoms with careful adjustment of ‘non-trigger foods’, and on top of that, they will prescribe an anti-spasmodic and tell you that certain herbs, spices, peppermint and charcoal will probably ease or eliminate symptoms altogether.

In many cases, however, nothing will truly alleviate the problem, and you are left with a gut full of wind and a belly full of pain.  Some days I have to lay on my front with a hot water bottle under my stomach, trying not to scream or cry, because I know that I won’t bloody well stop if I start!

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