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Der Gothmann: The Humanoid Boogie

It's full of Humanoid Rock'n'Roll.

Back to bloody, bloody paranoia about snow again.

 

Has anyone seen “Dead Snow“?

 

A couple of days ago, the snow came down.  It came down like the Berlin wall.

My partner and I were babysitting, and I thought it would be a nice idea if we had fish and chips for dinner, once the smaller humans had gone to sleep.  I left the house to get supper, and the roads were clear.  When I returned, there was over three inches of light snow covering the road like an overexcited infant had rushed through plastering everything in paper mache.  The thing is, the chip shop was next door to the house we were staying in, and I was only absent for fifteen minutes.

I had nearly an inch of snow settling on the top of my hat on the thirty-second walk back.

Last time there was a heavy snow here, in the UK, nation-wide weather warnings and paranoid news readings puffed at us about how very dangerous it was out there.  There were even some risible CCTV clips on the news, depicting some hapless people slipping over and hurting themselves just to emphasise to the silly people out there in the world that you can hurt yourself if you don’t watch what you’re doing.

I’m sure we are aware of that fact.  Thank-you for your implied concern, but as foolish as the population is when it comes to things like politics and when not to put your faith in an institution which is decidedly intent on removing the “money” from your bank account, surely we have enough common sense left to work out that when there is snow and ice on the street, caution must be taken to prevent injury?

Oh, and don’t forget to wrap up warm this winter!

How else are we meant to stave off the effects of the freezing cold anyway?  Stay indoors, but rather than put the heating on, wear a jumper or build a fire, (in the fireplace, I may add;  fire is dangerous too, you see,) we should writhe around naked on the floor, like an orgy of knobbly, pink snakes to keep our body heat in?

Urgh.

The more you decide you should spell things out for people, the less likely they are to think for themselves!  Why is the world always waiting for someone in the “government” to tell them what to do?  Take some initiative for once!

To some, this may feel like I’m stating the obvious, but I know so many people to whom “common sense” means very little.  These are the same stamp of people who think that “irony” means “sort-of-like iron”.

We know what snow and ice portends.  We know that driving without care in sub-zero conditions can be lethal.  Those who genuinely haven’t got a clue probably shouldn’t be allowed to hang around in the gene-pool anyway.

 

You know what?

After a little time spent thinking about it, the concept of writhing about with a whole bunch of naked people, having an orgy for warmth and survival is starting to have an increasing appeal for me…

 

 

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